Category Archives: Abby

Farewell to thee, Danny Devito

Danny Devito Stamper

Summer 2012 – October 16, 2013

Whitehouse, TX— Danny Devito, AKA Hubert Cumberdale, AKA Emmitt, the Russian “dorf” hamster, died Wednesday, October 16th, 2013 at the fabled Stamper/Johnston Estate, in Whitehouse following a brief illness.

He leaves behind, his companions of one year, Abigail Leigh & Emma Dawn, of the home; a brother, Doc, an Australian shepherd cowdog; 4 sisters, Bella the English Bulldog, Roxie the Guinea Pig, Kitty the Cat and a little baby person named Gracee; his benefactors, April, that thought he was cute, and Stoney, whom actually did not like him very much; and many close friends.

Born and raised in Tyler, TX, his father was Ivan the Hamster, of Leningrad, and his mother was a miniature cornfed harvest mouse named Twinkles, from Des Moines. Danny Devito was then relocated to Whitehouse.

In his early years, Danny Devito would help sell sunflower seeds, buckwheat and soybeans for the family’s hamster grocery store in the ghettos and mean streets of Tyler. Never one to be a victim of circumstance, he pulled himself up by the bootstraps, first being accepted into, and then graduating from, the prestigious Stuart Little School of Performing Arts in 2012, he then attended Ratatouille University, graduating in late 2012 with a bachelor’s degree in Cheese Economics.

After serving a short stint with the Coast Guard, Danny Devito had the opportunity to join the world famous rodent square dancing troop,
“the do-si-dos”, where he would go on to fame and fortune. However, the celebrity life did not suit him, so he moved back home to be with his family in Whitehouse.

Mr. Devito had a great passion for cuddling with humans and particularly enjoyed pooping in his owners hands, when he was held. For years, he would enjoy this pastime, and was also quite good at it.

An avid Bingo player, he was a longtime member of Loyal Order of Moose, Lodge 266, and was the Imperial Potentate of the Ancient Arabic Order of the Nobles of the Mystic Shrine, where he would participate in countless parades, driving itty bitty tiny cars, and wearing funny hats

A funeral service was held the night of his death, where he was laid to rest in an awesome time capsule, and a private burial, in the yard.

20131215-233127.jpg

Volume 9: GAME DAY!!! Time to squirt out a baby

Mad mama

Ok, ladies and gents……its GO TIME!!!  Every single crazy, miserable, funny and exhausting moment has lead up to THIS DAY!!!  If you are anything like me, you are probably scared out of your friggin’ mind, right now, even if you are trying to hide it from your baby mama.  Especially if it’s your first time around. Even though delivering a baby is considered pretty “routine”, in the eyes of medicine….it’s a wicked scary thing, especially when it’s YOUR wife and baby that are on the line. Here’s how our last 24 hours of pregnancy played out:

 

I’ve told the first part of this story a few times leading up to this.  I took the girls to school (Emma in pantyhose) and put them on standby: “Mom’s having contractions, and if she goes into labor our friend will get you from school and bring you to the hospital”.  We let our family in Oklahoma know that she had started having some contractions a little bit early but we were still on schedule to be induced at 5:30 the next morning.  The anxious feelings, the impatience and the excitement was literally nearly more than I could bear.  After all this time, she was almost here!!!  Well….April’s water never broke.  I never had to run around in the middle of the night like a crazy person, throwing bags of clothes around and helping her waddle to the car. I didn’t have to run red lights and screech in and out of traffic.  The nearest thing to that “moment” I had, was when she went to the bathroom for a while, came back out and said, “well, I just had my bloody show”. Continue reading Volume 9: GAME DAY!!! Time to squirt out a baby